Monday, July 23, 2012

Secret to a Long Lasting Relationship

Ever been in a long distance relationship?
Well I did but I don't think my love story is sweet and romantic enough to be shared here. So instead of telling you my story, I'm going to share my parents love story instead and how they managed to keep their relationship strong despite of all the trials that they've been through. I am currently not into any relationship but I am confident enough to say that God is probably too busy right now in writing the best and the most romantic love story for me. After all, I don't like to enter a relationship for the sake of having one. The right girl will come on the right place at the right time. Anyway, my mom and dad has been together for 24 years. One more year to go and they will be celebrating their Silver anniversary. Being together for such a long period of time is not a big joke because they both went through series of challenges and trials in their life that test their faith to each other.
My dad was a former seaman. He was an overseas worker and used to spend most of his time abroad.
As far as I can remember he used to spend 7-10 months working abroad and we are lucky enough if his employer will grant him a four month vacation. That's the only time that we can spend our time with him that's why we're making the most out of it. If we find it hard to deal with such kind of scenario, we knew that our mom felt ten times harder than our situation.

There's no internet during that time and my mom can't mail my dad either since he's working on a ship. Communication can only be done through phone calls and my mom has to follow my dad's break schedule which is usually during 1 am to 4 am in the morning. It became their daily routine.
I would be lying if I said that my parents never had any conflict or misunderstanding. We've seen them quarrel and we've heard my mom shouting over the phone but that's pretty normal and the good thing is that they both managed to solve their issue before it gets worst. Being in a long distance relationship is probably one of the hardest and most crucial situation between 2 married couples. It will definitely test their faith to each other. So i personally asked my mom about the secret of their long lasting relationship and here's what she has to say:
"We managed to stay strong by simply trusting each other. I know it is quite a risk but we both made it through. I trust him and I love him and that is good enough for me to convince myself that he will not be tempted to enter be with another woman because I know he feel the same way for me. We believe in our marriage and the vows that we made and that's what matters most to keep our relationship strong" [translated from Tagalog]
How your relationships stays strong despite hindrances and hardships?

"We both make sure that we fix our problem before it gets worst. Communication is very important in our relationship. We make sure that we spend quality time to each other despite of our distance. Actually, unlike today, we can only communicate via phone calls. We do not have Facebook accounts or any form of communication via Internet. It's hard but I am glad that we managed to survive"

What's the Hardest challenge that you encountered?
" I remember we had an issue before about this girl who was rumored to be his mistress which almost kill our relationship. But It was actually my fault. I went to believe those rumors without even asking my husband about the real deal between them. Everything is nothing but a rumor and none of them are true. Maybe i was just too paranoid that time but God is really good because we were able to save our marriage. Oh and we learned our own lesson too."

What is your greatest sacrifice to make him feel more loved?
" You know what, the fact that I used to spend 8 to 10 consecutive months without him is actually a big sacrifice on my end and I'm sure he felt the same way. But the thing here is that we are not just lovers here, we are also your parent and we are responsible for raising you well. These sacrifice , your dad's sacrifice was dedicated for you and your younger siblings"

Now, who's my mom inspiration? Of course it came from my grandparents. My Lolo and Lola have been together for 54 years and even my grandpa died last 2000, my grandma still celebrate their anniversary every year until she left us two years ago. Their love for each other is truly unconditional which serve as our inspiration too. I am not getting any younger and I'm sure I will come to a point that I have to sacrifice myself for my family as well. I might also work abroad for my family and I will definitely take my parent's story as my inspiration.
My dad suffered from mild stroke last 2001 which made half of his body paralyzed. My mom is currently taking care of him and spending most of her time for my dad. It is truly an inspiration for all of us and I am very grateful to have a loving parents like them. It is now our time to bring the courtesy back and help them in their situation.
Their story might not be as inspiring or as complicated as the three couples shown in this video below but their romantic love story is good enough to motivate and inspire us. Feel free to Watch Tide with Downy video entitled "Pag-ibig na Pangmatagalan" (Long lasting Love)

Interestingly, Tide and Downy came up with this cute and inspiring campaign. Tide with Downy Bangong Padala campaign invited couples to share their love stories and photos exemplifying their love that lasts even though they are separated by distance. Out of 100 entries, the top 3 were chosen and was featured in this very special video.
With the help of Mr Ivan Henares, he will take an exciting journey in three selected destinations. The first one is the inspiring love story between Nicholas and her wife Cecille who has been longing for his husband who needed to work far from his family. The second one is the heartwarming relationship of Hazel and Arnel Bustillo who is a soldier and who used to spend most of his time in the army. The third one is almost identical to my mom's situation. It features the long distance relationship of Emmanuel and Myrna Marapao.
How about you guys? Do you have any story to share about long distance relationship? How do you manage to keep your relationship strong despite of that difficult situation?

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